On a Roll

I may or may not be very, very pleased with myself right now.

This is what I did this afternoon:

I went to Coastal Seafoods and bought 2 lobsters (that Zach was somewhat freaked out by), I had my picture taken with said lobsters, and then I killed them by submerging their clawing selves into a boiling pot of water, white wine, onion halves, fresh thyme, and celery stalks. The least I could do was given them fragrant water to die in. (Is this morbid? I’m thinking so.)

Moving on…

Then I whisked up (literally) some homemade mayonnaise. It was a good enough workout that I’m confident that I burned all of the calories in the lobster roll (and yes, I do know how many calories that is, I also know how hard the whisking job was). I chilled that mayonnaise.

I spent a good 30 minutes struggling to get the lobster meat out of those bright coral-colored crustaceans. Chopped up the meat.

Chopped some iceberg, some green onions, melted some butter, and put the paprika on standby.

Then I sliced up some buns. Not your regular hotdog buns, of course. Also, unfortunately, not the traditional New England top-split hot dog buns that kind of look like folded pieces of sandwich bread. I had to use what we have here in Minneapolis: Breadsmith brat buns. They actually didn’t disappoint. I split them open, brushed them with a generous amount of butter and grilled them until they were golden crispy buttery brown.

I placed some shredded iceberg in the bottom of the buns, spooned in the glistening lobster salad, sprinkled on some green onions and paprika, and then drizzled the remaining melted butter over the tops of them. I decided at that moment that the chance of us liking them greatly increased with the drizzling of melted butter across the top.

And the result was something even better than I had anticipated. I’m not usually a fan of iceberg, but it was a necessary component to this lobster roll. The green onions were also crucial. The whole cool, crispy, velvety, smooth, but zippy roll was perfect.

It was delicious.

It was really, really amazing.

I know this because Zach told me about 50 times how good it was while we were eating. To be fair, I think only about half of those times were because he really meant it. I think the other half were said because he didn’t want me to get mad that he still had the game on and was peering over his shoulder after every bite to look at the score. And I also know how good they are because I didn’t care that he had the game on while we ate.

We may be in Minnesota, but this girl is on a roll with her lobsta roll making…

Lobster Rolls (Adapted slightly from the April 2011 issue of Bon Appetit)

Mayonnaise

2 large egg yolks

2 tbsp fresh lemon juice

1 cup olive oil (not extra virgin)

¼ tsp Dijon mustard

Lobster Rolls

1 cup dry white wine

1 large onion, halved

2 celery stalks

6 fresh thyme sprigs

2 tbsp sea salt

3 - 1½  lb live lobsters

4 Breadsmith brat buns

6 tbsp melted butter, unsalted

1 1/3 cups thinly shredded iceberg lettuce

2 green onions, thinly sliced

Paprika, to garnish

Boil lobsters:

Fill very large pot with 12 quarts water, wine, onion, celery, and thyme. Bring to boil.

When water boils, add 2 tbsp salt to pot. Add lobsters. Put lid back on and wait for water to boil again (about 8 minutes). After water is boiling again, take lid off and continue to cook lobsters for about 2 more minutes or until cooked through. Remove lobsters from pot and let cool for 15 mins.

Make mayonnaise:

Put egg yolks in medium glass bowl. Add lemon juice and 1 tbsp water, and whisk. Put bowl over a small pot of simmering water (don’t let bowl touch water). Whisk constantly until mixture gets very thick, about 4-5 minutes. Off heat, slowly add in olive oil, whisking continuously. Then whisk in mustard. Season with salt and pepper. Chill.

Assemble rolls:

Remove lobster meat, and dice into 1-inch chunks, and place in medium bowl. Add in about ½ cup mayonnaise, just to bind it.

Heat frying pan over medium heat. Slice buns (not all the way through), brush insides with butter, and place buttered sides down in frying pan. Press down to brown the buns, about 5 minutes.

Put buns on plate. Layer some of the shredded iceberg onto bun. Top with lobster salad. Repeat until all buns and salad are used. Sprinkle with green onions and paprika. Drizzle remaining melted butter over the tops of the lobster rolls.

Serve immediately.